So the haze is back with a vengeance after a respite over the past weekend. At 10pm, the 3h PSI was 194 which is like unhealthy range? Anw I’ve been super paranoid about this haze thing this year also, not v sure why but I’m just like OMG IM GNA DIE every time I step outside and I can smell haze hahaha.
I had dinner w Marcus and we chatted till around 10pm? Then the dessert place kinda chased us away so we went to NTUC and then parted ways. Called home to check if my sissy was home yet and she wasn’t so I called her ask if she wanted to go home together. And just as I met her, my phone rang and… it was my dad offering to pick the both of us up because the haze was v bad.
Because even though home is just a bus ride away, from the bus stop to my house it’s still about a mininum 5min walk D: WHICH MEANS 5 MINUTES OF BREATHING IN HAZARDOUS PARTICLES WHICH MEANS 5 MINUTES CLOSER TO DEATH. And thinking of that, my dad offered to leave the comfort of home to drive to Bishan just so that we wouldn’t have to breathe in the haze any more than we had to.
WHERE TO FIND THIS KIND OF FATHERLY LOVE :’) Thinking about it rly makes me feel v fortunate and loved. My dad doesn’t say I love you, but shows it in the little actions like that :’)
…The number of friends we have or the amount of time we spend out of our home doesn’t define who we are. I think you’re one of the sweetest person I’ve ever known who has such a contagious laughter, someone who naturally brings a lot of joy to others, and it’s these things that make you special and make you who you are k?:)
For days when I lousy about myself. Tq my dear dear friend ❤
Selene came back from London the day I was supposed to fly to Morocco. The girl arrived home at 4am but still bothered to wake up before 9am because she wanted to have breakfast together :’)
I remember I was very bothered by what to pack to Morocco because I would have to pack to battle the chill here in Netherlands as I walked to and fro the train station and home. But Morocco would be incredibly hot. I wouldn’t want to bring my coat all the way to Morocco also because how lame would that be right, carrying a coat to a place where the temperature is above 30 degrees. So I was very much in a dilemma. I voiced it to Aloy and to my utter surprise and disbelief, he said that he could help me bring my coat over to the train station when I’m back so I wouldn’t have to face the cold omg. I WAS SO LIKE WTH ARE YOU SERIOUS. I didn’t really believe it tho because didn’t want to give myself false hope of warmth hahaha.
So I borrowed Selene’s light down jacket from Uniqlo that is amazing because it can be rolled into a small little thing that I can hang on my bag and mentally prepared myself to walk back home with only that.
But when I touched down in the Netherlands, I received a message from Aloy saying to let him know what time I would arrive at the train station because it was cold and that he would pick me up omg I WAS LIKE OMG ARE YOU SURE ARE YOU FOR REAL T.T T.T
And so when I arrived and walked out of the train station, I was greeted by the familiar faces of Aloy and Marcus and I cannot even describe how happy and lucky I felt. Marcus was there becos he was going home la but still omg SO MUCH LOVE.
When I got home, Selene who tends to cave up in her room at night came running down to say hi and Aloy heated up the chik kut teh that Selene cooked (and saved for me) and I HAD FOOD. Because my flight was at 4.55pm and no food on the plane so I didn’t have a proper dinner T.T And they knew so they kept food for me omg I WAS SO TOUCHED YKNW. I walked home warm because I had food and came home to a warm family and food ^^v
So touched :’)
And this morning they all gathered in my room to talk. I love little things like that and it’s little things like that that I will miss the most from my exchange 🙂
Wowow check out my ~ artistic ~ title of the post.
It just hit me today that after I come back from my exchange programme next year, the group of people who have been such incredible advisors/ friends would have left NUS. All the current year 4s like Ming Ming, Ben, Louis… I’ll really miss bumping into them in school and having quick conversations to catch up. It feels so surreal that we’re already year 3. It doesn’t feel like it was that long ago that we were freshies – completely new to the system and like lost sheep.
It was really thanks to Ming, Ben and other seniors that we somehow managed to navigate the slightly treacherous NUS route. Where would I be without them to guide me? Who would I ask for advice about modules, about lectures, about everything school-related (or not)? I’m so grateful to have met such giving people in NUS. That they willingly and freely share their experiences with us so that we can learn from it; what to do and what not to do. That they share their opinions and notes (! haha) with us. A competitive environment might help us improve quickly, but I think it pales in comparison to a nurturing environment where everyone looks out for and helps each other. Success is measured by how much we achieve in numbers in our society. But when we meet people who are willing to put some of their time away to help others, I think it makes everything so much more meaningful.
It makes me feel so sad that when I come back, this incredible group of people won’t be around school anymore. Louis just mentioned that he’d miss me when I go for exchange because I slightly brighten his day whenever we happen to meet in school (but of course, I take whatever Louis says with a liberal shake of the salt shaker) which really made me go aww. And Ming Ming and I have been in a very appreciative mood for the past two weeks. And Ben has been so forthcoming with sharing his exchange experience with me whenever I ask questions.
I know goodbyes are only temporary. People have to make the effort to keep in touch. But then it also feels like I’m saying goodbye to this stage of life where I can depend on them to give me advice regarding school. Where I can bump into them in school. It won’t be the same really.
I just read some posts in Jefferson’s blog and I’m so moved by his writing. I always knew he has a great command of the English language but I think as our interactions became shallower as we drifted apart during JC and after, I sort of forgot that. Then I saw a link to his WordPress on Facebook a few days ago and curious Pui San decided to click on it.
Just read some of his posts and I’m so blown away. He really really writes beautifully. I can’t exactly put it. It’s so personal and heart-wrenching some of his posts. It makes me reflect a bit and I feel slightly guilty for being a bad friend for not being able to help him through his difficult phase. It reminds me of the times I carelessly commented on his weight loss, forgetting that it must have been such a painful period of time for him. And I’m so impressed by him for pulling through all that and becoming a stronger person (I think). I feel so lucky that he counts me among one of his friends 🙂 And I feel like I’ve so so much to learn from him.
Okay that’s the end of my gushing post about Jefferson heh.
CONTINUING MY EPIC LONG POST ABOUT MY EPIC 20TH BIRTHDAY ♥
Mei and I had to fly off to Raffles Place because my mum almost lost her temper when she found out we were still at Esplanade. It was because I was dilly dallying hahaha HOW COULD I BEAR TO LEAVE THE FULL OF SURPRISES ESPLANADE ROOFTOP RIGHT. ST, Hazel, PJ and I left together, making sure I was holding and showing off the board that announced my birthday to the world. To our greatest surprise (and Hazel was super happy I think), a lady actually came up to me to wish me a happy birthday when we were tryna take a picture hahaha. Whee thank you random lady for adding to my happy birthday 🙂
So mei and I rushed over to Si Chuan Dou Hua Restuarant to meet my family (who were all there already oops). ALL WAITING FOR THE BIRTHDAY GIRL AKA ME AND MEIMEI. Because it was a combined dinner celebration for the both of us. Saving money by celebrating together wheee. My parents got me a bouquet as well! Pretty flowers! :D:D Turns out my parents were in on the secret too gosh MY FAMILY SO DEVIOUS ❤
Had a super good dinner w family omg EXPENSIVE GOOD FOOD REALLY. But I was a bit full and high on happiness so somehow the food sorta paled in comparison to what I had experienced just hours ago haha oops. Q wasted right D: But rly the food was super good. Didn’t take pictures of it because the table was too laden w food to take a nice shot. BUT my tummy was v happy.
Took several pictures at the restaurant itself because we wanted a background different from the white wall at home LOL. Some of my favourite pictures of the day ~
Featured is the huge pink board I was carrying around LOL.
We decided to try the dou hua since yknw.. the place is Si Chuan Dou Hua. BUT THEN I think Rochor Beancurd um is just as good. Maybe idk how to appreciate it oops.
After that we gathered our many belongings and off we went to my daddy’s car.
BUT THE CAR COULDN’T START OMG HAHAHAHA SO EXCITING RIGHT. Of all days for it to happen… LOL. Was quite hilarious.
So I left some stuff in the car (like my board oops) and then we all went to cab home while my daddy (poor thing) waited for AA to come give life to his dead battery. SIGH I felt so bad for abandoning daddy by his car alone 😦
Went home and didn’t do much. Waited for daddy to come home to cut my birthday caaaakeeeee yay!! SUPER CUTE BIRTHDAY CAKE THIS YEAR. I didn’t realise it was so cute when I selected it.
Didn’t realise that the words on the cake were so meaningful HAHAHA. Sunflower. Height. HAS A HUGE RELATION TO ME.
So we of course did our usual family phototaking thing at every birthday ~
But my brother was too tired by then already so we didn’t have that many fun photos this year sigh pie. Glad we took so many pictures at the restaurant so I didn’t feel that upset about it. BESIDES NOTHING COULD SPOIL MY MOOD THAT DAY MAN.
After eating the cake my mum walked my grandma home (yay happy about this as well, becos I rly think my mum should spend more time w my popo) so mei and I waited for her to come home so that we could open my presents together~
Usually I get a bit upset when we don’t follow the ritual through (yes I’m childish like that oops). Like at every birthday, we have to take photos as a family, individual / group shots, then cut and give out the cake, then sit down together and watch the birthday kid open and marvel at his/her gifts. But then since my 20th birthday already so incredibly atypical and happy-making.. I was completely fine w only mei and mummy w me while I opened my presents. HAHA
Clue #4: Mummy called out mei for texting while I was opening my gifts. But I figured it was probably something to do with school so I was like ‘aiya nvm la’
And I’ve discovered that perhaps gifts are getting less and less meaningful to me (unless it’s thoughtful/useful/something I rly want) and heartfelt letters are what really makes me happy. The idea that my friend has put in effort and time to write me a lovely long letter is something far more precious to me now. GROWING UP EH THIS PUISAN.
So that was done and the Chia family birthday rituals came to an end. Mei and I retired to our room where she…
Clue #5: Was busy w the iPad when I emerged from the washroom and our room looked suspiciously neat. I was thinking like, wow she so fast start looking for news articles for GP / why she pack our room suddenly but okay.
She turned to me and said “Eh jie, I found this website quite interesting” or something along that lines.
So I innocently took the iPad and DUM DUM DUM DUMMMMMMMM
My outwardly reaction was more like “Eh? Eh?? What is this isn’t this hmm hmmm”
Mei was quite unimpressed by my reaction HAHA. But I WAS READING THROUGH THE MESSAGES OMG SORRY TO DISAPPOINT LA.
So like it was all fine before I decided to call ST to properly thank him for all he has prepared for me omg. Surprise + tumblr?! 真的要？！！！
Damn super duper grateful and I think it just ALL HIT ME WHEN I STARTED TALKING TO THIS BFFFF FOR THE PAST SIX YEARS. Like super overwhelmed by all the love from my friends and the happiness from the day and I just started to WAIL. I just kept going like ‘omg why are you all so nice to me really you’re so nice I’m so touched what have I done omg thank you thank you thank you’
I closed the door to cry but then my parents rushed over like super worried, thinking that something bad happened. THEY WERE LIKE WHAT’S WRONG WITH YOU SIAO AH LOLOL.
But yeah I was just really super thankful for all that ST planned for me. Even tho he kept saying that oh no Hazel did a lot also I’m sure Hazel did really BUT I KNOW YOU MASTER PLANNER LA YOU. ❤ Thank you so so so much ST 爱死你了.
Yup so that’s how I ended my super exciting 20th birthday. 😀 Thank you everyone involved in it. LOVE YOU GUYS TO BITS.
This year was really one of the most surprising birthdays I’ve had. Also one of the most touching. Felt so incredibly loved by my friends and family and lucky that I’ve such an awesome bunch behind me. 27 Sept 2013 is gna be one of the days I look back on when I’m having a tough time 🙂
This year I honestly wasn’t really looking forward to my birthday that much. I chalked it up to getting older and more mature LOL. I know this is despite the fact that I kept reminding my friends that my birthday was coming teehee oops. Sorry, bad habits are a bit hard to break. I was actually more excited about Big Bang’s concert the week before than my own birthday.
So my plan was.. to study in the morning then head out to meet Melissa the birthday girl for Max Brenner’s, study UTU a bit then have dinner w my family. I know it sounds not v exciting but I was really quite satisfied w it. I knew my friends were busy w school, plus I wanted to celebrate w Melissa because it’s both our birthdays and how cool is that right! 😀 Birthday Max Brenner’s is gna be our yearly thing hahaha wheeeee.
Gna do a very detailed post because ST requested and he’s eagerly anticipating this hahaha. Plus I think my birthday deserves a nice, detailed post 😀
Received a number of lovely midnight/near-midnight messages from different people. ST had duty so he sent me a message earlier haha I suppose it counts to because I’m sure he’d have been one of the firsts if he could have been! Two messages that rly made me smile, one from Susu and one from Choonz.
Susu sent me this:
Really appreciated her efforts in sourcing for the pictures and putting it together. Anddd a bit thick skinned I know but, q happy when people associate me w being sunny also. Cheesy I know but I like knowing that I made people happy also! Because my friends are really one of the brightest parts of my life 🙂
Choonz FB message was…
Noticing a pattern? Hahaha 😉 I was really like omg aww aww at these two messages 🙂
Of course I had some other really sweet birthday messages wheee thanks so much for showering me w birthday messages love. It’s one of the things I like best about birthdays!
So I went to sleep after that, woke up and had a very productive morning! Revised a bit of UTU, did what I had to do for NM Soc, replied birthday messages intermittently as well. I was so happy with my productive morning haha. Arranged to meet Melissa earlier because I realised she didn’t have anything on before meeting me anyway. I forgot our new meeting time already 😦 Suffice to say, it was one of those odd timings I have come to prefer. Hahaha yay to weird meeting times 😀
Wore my pretty, (not so) new dress w zebra prints again because I wanted to at least dress differently for my birthday. Packed my UTU notes in my bag, the camera and my instax and set off ~ Was late in meeting Melissa D: Gah so sorry to make you wait during your birthday. In the train there I was totally judging this queer couple engaging in PDA. Really… a bit too much. BUT ENTERTAINING. I made sure to file away the information in my head so that I could report it to Melissa when I met her hahaha.
Was texting ST about them also and…
Clue #1: He said that there was a tall lady in front of him as well. I was thinking like eh? Since when his camp got girl. But I didn’t dwell too deeply on it.
Met Melissa who was lounging around on the sofas at the basement of Esplanade. Almost missed her, luckily she heard the bell on my anklet, if not it’d be like some Korean drama hoho. Exciting stuff, filming Korean dramas on my birthday.
Went up to Max Brenner and HAPPY STUFF BECAUSE GOT 1-FOR-1 DEAL HAHAHA. So happyyy whee whee. Cheapos even on our birthdays.
Was all not bad! But got a bit too sweet for us after awhile. Melissa also gave me a nice birthday card omg I feel so bad. Thanks so much for such a sweet, mushy message teehee. So out-of-character for you!! So I really appreciate it ♥
Oh yeah. Midway through the meal, I received a birthday text from Benedict Chan being all cryptic and like ‘i foresee many surprises coming your way’. Melissa was like ‘Who is Benedict Chan. Damien Chan’s brother ah’ then we went on to discuss what he could be referring to. But I sorta concluded that he was being weird and talking rubbish hahaha.
After that Melissa seemed really eager to leave and check out the Merlion. She said she saw it on TV while watching F1 and thought it was really cute, like she never really appreciated it enough in her 20 years in Singapore (okay that’s just my interpretation hahaha). I thought she was being really cute and didn’t think too much about it because sometimes Melissa does strange, incomprehensible, q cute things like that. It’s one of the v endearing things about her to me – like she seems so fierce but actually she’s v funny hahaha. But fierce. I WILL BE FIERCE TOOOOO. One day.
So we went out and took many pictures. I was a bit bemused actually.
Clue #2: In the many times that I’ve gone out w Melissa, I’ve never seen her take so many pictures before. Okay no, I guess we took a lot of pictures last year during our birthday. But I’ve never seen her want to take so many pictures before. IT WAS LIKE THIS OTHER SIDE OF MELISSA THAT I’VE NEVER SEEN. Can’t believe she asked me several times if I wanted to take a photo. But I chalked it up to her liking the camera.
Saw a hopscotch drawn on the floor for a Children’s day event. So I took advantage of her sudden interest in taking photos and we took this:
I was a bit like OH NO the hopscotch didn’t have 9. BUT genius birthday girl (not me) said we could take a photo w no.9 with an upside down no.6 omg. SO SMART THIS GIRL. Hahahaha.
Then we slowly strolled along Singapore river (I had to Google to make sure my blogpost is factually accurate. So much effort I put in right). Took many pictures of the skyline and tried to take selcas and panorama photos. A bit fail on my end HAHA. But I think hers not bad.
So we trekked slowly to the Merlion to see it close up. So many tourists!! We had a good time um, checking out the tourists’ interesting poses. I wonder if Italians look at tourists in the same way when they do all the strange poses near the Leaning Tower of Pisa. Probably right! Hahaha. So we also took a few photos at the Merlion. But really superrr crowded and it was q difficult to get someone to take the photo for us D: Taking solo shots not as fun! Asking people to help us take pictures is so troublesome gah.
After taking several pictures and two instax photos, Melissa asked me where I wanted to go next. I was like uhh. I had the time to spare since it was still q early. But I didn’t really know where to go D: It seemed to be a choice between going to Gardens by the Bay to take more photos and going to MBS. Both seemed really far to me but I was just like um do you wna go to Gardens by the Bay? But she was lazy (or so I thought) and politely rejected my suggestion. I was slightly relieved tho haha because GTBB really looked super far away. So as per her suggestion, we decided to walk back to Esplanade and go to the rooftop and take pictures from there becos ‘also can see MBS / GTBB’. Hahaha I was like okay sure.
We ambled to the souvenir shop where we spent some time being appalled at the hiked up prices. Tourist spots really /shakes head. Then we walked back to Esplanade. Midway through the bridge, she started walking at a pace much faster than our slow ambling pace throughout the day. She said she needed to use the washroom rly badly so I was like okay sure let’s hurry back then. Suddenly…
Clue #3: She answered a call. I didn’t really pay attention to the details but I overheard her saying something like “Yeah in 5 minutes”. So obviously I asked what was happening. She mumbled something about how it was some coordinator from her school and her friend, being a bit strange, wanted to text back the coordinator at the same time – which was in 5 minutes time.
Quite weird but okay. I found it a bit fishy but I couldn’t really catch what she was saying (because she was walking so fast!) and didn’t want to annoy her so I didn’t ask more questions. Besides, it was some school thing so I figured that she probably would explain to me later after she was a bit uh, more relieved.
<edit> According to Melissa after I asked her, what she told me to explain in 5 minutes’ was “… it was something I coordinated w one friend to msg another friend w my friends from school”. Her “hurried and worried” explanation hahaha </edit>
So we hurried back to Esplanade and headed to the rooftop. On the way up she was going “oh gosh has it been five minutes already. I need to call my friend” And she was like frantically dialing which was honestly a bit strange but I was thinking okay she has some strange friends hahaha. Saw the sign for the Esplanade library and she was like oh didn’t know there was a library here. I then asked if she wanted to go check it out since yknw, I thought we had all the time in the world, don’t need to rush anywhere what. The view at the rooftop isn’t going anywhere. But she smoothly rejected my suggestion. On hindsight, she must have been quite panicked when I suggested it LOL.
By the time we got to the rooftop, she did actually show signs of being a bit flustered. Like she really kept on calling ‘Sally’ and even said really loudly “Why isn’t Sally answering my call?!!”
SOOOOOOOOO obviously I’m not that stupid la and started suspecting something already.
Once we got to the rooftop, out from the bushes popped A BUNCH OF MY FRIENDS SINGING HAPPY BIRTHDAY O M G.
I WAS REALLY LIKE WTHOMGWHATISHAPPENINGWHOARETHESEPEOPLEWHATWHAT OMG MELISSA?!!! WHATISTHIS hahahaha.
I don’t exactly remember what I was saying, probably just a lot of omg omg omg and squeals. Like really, my friends from the different sections of my life eh!!!
Here is when it gets a little bit messy so I’m just gna type the thoughts that ran through my head when it happened:
ST YOU DID THIS OMG YOU BEST FRIEND FOREVER
i can’t believe i told melissa that ST wouldn’t ever do this.
IS THAT ISAAC?! AND BRIAN?!
Omg this Zhi’An damn good at keeping secrets
AGNES CORRINE SAMUEL ZHIQI?!
I can’t believe they did this for me
FOR ME omg
And Melissa helped SHE IS SO GOOD AT LYING
Gosh but it’s Melissa’s birthday also omg WHY SHE SO NICE T.T
It’s only my 20th birthday WHY THEY SO NICE TO ME
I have the best friends ever
DIDN’T HAZEL JUST HAVE HER EXAMS
MADE ME SAD FOR THE WHOLE DAY BUT NOW OMG.
ST is my best friend. FOREVER.
What did I do to deserve such awesome friends omg I DON’T DESERVE THEM.
… As you can tell it was a very dramatic moment for me.
EVEN SHERLYN CAME with her boyfriend whom I was very happy to meet and talk to for the first time in their what, 2 years together? I don’t even know. So tough to meet Sherlyn nowadays hahaha so glad she managed to come super grateful omg. And speaking of her boyfriend, I was really like omg they are SO COMPATIBLE. I’ve never met him before that day. After meeting him I could finally honestly say that I was happy for her. They’re so cute together gosh. If only her parents could see that meh.
I was talking to Isaac and Brian most I think. They were filling me in on all the gossip I missed from not meeting up w them LOL. OH BUT of all people.. they were the people I expected to see least because they really have little to no connection to my groups of friends. ST YOU CAN WORK MAGIC. So touched that all the three guys managed to come. So lucky also!! Happy to be able to catch up w them and I RESOLVED ONCE AGAIN TO TRY HARDER TO KEEP IN TOUCH W THEM LOL. Let’s see how long it lasts la. Oh Xun Yi came also, but he came immediately after he booked out (omg damn sweeet) so was a bit late. BUT IT’S THE THOUGHT THAT COUNTS. :’) And the three of them gave me a craftaholic-like bunny. According to Brian, they didn’t intend to get me the bunny at first! They were tryna win a soft toy from a claw machine (I Googled the name. It’s those you put in money and try to grab a soft toy kinda thing) but realised that they were q bad at it. So instead of spending more on that, they decided to get me Stripey. Hahaha it’s rly q sweet of them 😀
I didn’t talk much to my uni friends (feels a bit weird grouping them like that haha). D: Felt quite bad about it oops. But they gave me this really really pretty pop-up card that Sam made and popcorn which is damn nice so yummy. Food gifts are of course good gifts.
So grateful to this group of friends really. Idk how I’d have survived a year in Uni w/o their support and study tips and all that 😀 I’ve said it like a million times but… I’m so glad I went for NM camp last year and got sorted into the blue group ❤ Oh and my new friends from exco aww THANKS ALSO FOR COMING. :D:D:D
Melissa had to leave rly soon tho because she was gna have dinner at Table Manners (what a name) w family. Omg thanks so so so much for helping and planning the surprise for me. LOVE YOU LOTS MELISSA.
AND MY MEI MEI HAHAHAHA. I BET YOU WERE THINKING (if you remembered to read la) WHY THIS JIEJIE NEVER TALK ABOUT ME HAHAHA. BEST SISTER AWARD GOES TO YOU. EVERY. YEAR. Every year I think my birthday gna be nothing much, somehow you’ve a role to play in making my birthday far more than I expected. IDK how you managed to keep such a huge secret from me, YOU MUST HAVE BEEN BURSTING HAHA. Thank you so much for being such a cool sis, I really enjoy listening to your stories. And now you’re sleeping so I must go wake you up.
And to Hazel, ST and PJ…
Thank you so so so freaking much for planning this for me. I don’t even know how to articulate how grateful I am to you for not only planning such a wonderful surprise for me but also for being some of the best friends a girl will ever have. Thanks for always being there for me, for being my pillars of support and security blanket. For always supporting me in whatever I do, even for laughing at my mistakes so that I can learn to laugh at them too. I don’t know what I’d do w/o y’all. And and I know Hazel and PJ y’all not close I bet my birthday was the first time y’all talked so much to each other HAHA.
I really omg /cries (which I did later in the day).
is the only word I can think of to describe myself. I must have like saved the planet or something in my past life.
Uni friends and Sherlyn had to leave q soon. And before long mei and I had to leave to meet my family for dinner.
Which will come in part two teehee.
I know there were so many details that I missed out but really, HOW TO DETAIL EVERYTHING IN WORDS. The entire day was so incredibly spectacular.
Yup so I’m done for now. Part 2 will come… hopefully by the end of the coming week lol. SEE HOW.
I realise that most people don’t care what is now playing for me -.- But this song is really the SWEETEST. I’m so touched by the lyrics and idk, it’s just so PERFECT. I feel so reflective and lovely now and touched and wow I love it, I really do.
Where Infinite sings a love song but plot twist! It’s for their mothers. I absolutely love Sunggyu’s parts in the song where he sings about how his mother’s always close by so he thought it’s okay (not to say I love you to her).